Grief. Without warning it smacks you in the face and lodges in your throat.

You start snapping at those closest to you and you can’t think straight because your mind is flooded with flashbacks and regrets and wishes and that unbearable ache.

And you realise all over again with gut- wrenching pain that she’s never coming back, that it’s not just a terrible dream or a story to tell.

Our baby girl will never take her first breath, we’ll never know the reality of bringing up twins and our missing piece will always be missing. Is anyone’s heart strong enough for that truth? Is anyone’s mind clear enough to process that reality? Mine sure doesn’t feel like it is.

There are just some days you have to hold your hands up and surrender to the tears, just to dislodge that lump...until next time.

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